dad (an old tiler) loses his home

[tiler burden]

hi

just a bit of advice to anyone who might find themselves in this unfortunate position...

my dad has alzheimers and he has been mentally ill for a while now receiving treatment in a hospital. yesterday me and my 18 year old brother attended a final meeting to find out whether the state would help fund his care home.
the answer was no, he did not qualify for any help! so as a result, they are to put an order on his house to pay for the care home (upto 1000 per week) in other words all his lifes work counts for nothing..

my mum died 12 years ago at 45 of breast cancer and her only consolation in death was that my brother and i would at least have the family home for our future. not now we dont. i tend to be philisophical over things like this. its the only way to help but there is a tinge of resentment to our present government. it seems ironic that the party who my dad put his loyalty and trust in, is the ones who have shafted him. i wouldnt have minded if we had to pay half and they contributed half but to lose everything when a person who doesnt have a home gets all their care home costs paid, doesnt seem to be fair. dont get me wrong if your poor then i agree they should be helped but if they have played the game, then where is the justice in someone like my dad losing everything. hes paid tax and ni all his life and employed many people but hes not got alot his only wish was to leave something for his kids...

i have looked after him for 2 years now, lost alot of work and as a result went bankrupt last october 2006. i dont get a penny from anyone, never have. i have always been a positive hard working fella who would do anything for anyone but i feel a bit confused today. it was my brothers 18th birthday yesterday and to sit in on an official meeting and find out this news on his birthday really pi88ed me off.

but theres one thing in life at 38 i have found is, keeping going. dont let situations chew you up. get up dust yourself down and keep going. this forum represents alot of hope for me because its full of good people who are in the same boat all will try to help and cheer you up when the going gets tough. i will continue to help people in any way i can . no way i am i going to adopt the current trend that seems to be around of me me me attitude.

so the advice i started with is.....put your house in your childrens name as soon as you can. they cant take your house if its in your childrens name 7 years before your diagnosed with mental illness. that way they cant do to you , what theyve done to us! if you live in scotland then you dont have to worry, your country seems to look after its sick people :0)

sorry to burden you all with this but if our loss is someones gain on this forum then theres some consolation and good to come out of this . i am just looking forward to continuing learning and setting up a new life in australia with my wife, 3 kids and brother in the next 18 months to 2 years and putting the last 12 years to rest. living on the sun, doing a job i will love and being healthy and happy is all i want in life, oh and to leave a home for their future?

onwards and upwards hey

regards
ed

 

[myhometiling]

really sorry to hear that
nobody should lose there home
works the same way over hear
it seems to me the more you play by the rules the more u
are hit for it....

calvy.

 

[elliesdad224]

:furious3:sorry to read your sad message ed, it does not say much for our country when it cant look after its old and ill people without taking their life long savings:frown2:

 

[poolie18]

Sorry to hear your news Ed.

This country set up the first National health service which in it's day led the world. Now through bad managment, greed and a money orientated culture it is bleeding the life out of the people that once made it made Great.

Regards Poolie.

 

[DHTiling]

Hi ed mate...we will give you all the advise and support you need in your quest to be a tiler and good luck on your move to oz.....look to the future ed thats what counts now mate.......

 

[Rad2474]

Yeah just goes to show what this country is coming to,hard honest workers get shafted while the do-gooders bend over backwards to help the immigrants and the benefits grabbers. Hope everything works out for you and your family.

 

[brummie tiler]

sorry to here that mate. Thats England for you though, work hard all your life- and for what??? keep going mate, i wish i had your posotive attitude

 

[White Room]

I do wish you all the best for the future, we just seem to hammered on every corner turned, I know when my dad died my brothers and myself had to find over £30,000 for the tax man before we could even sell the house, and again like your father paid his taxes all his life, It stinks.

 

[CJ]

Wot a sad sad story............

All the best to you TB.

Chin up.....................and as the saying goes....(Well, in the old TV programme PORRIDGE)

"Don't let the B'stards grind you down"

 

[Fekin]

Same thing happened with my grand mother, on my dads side.

She had to go into a care home, and my dad had to sell her home to fund care costs, but it didn't really affect him really because hes loaded.

Best of luck

 

[GazTech]

Chin up Ed mate ...best of luck with your'e new found begginings.....Gaz

 

[scottish tiler]

damn instead of helping ppl like your dad our goverment spend money on refuges and new houses for them and all that, hope things get beter for you m8 all the best

 

[devonmark]

Sorry to hear that Ed...good ole england..pay in all your life and get nothin back..Mark.

 

[tiler burden]

thanks for all the support, it honestly does makes a huge difference when you see people on here getting behind you ;0)

best thing for me to do is put it behind me and move on and invest my time in my kids and their future. one good thing about mistakes and bad experiences is you can learn from them and help others avoid them! tomorrows another day hey?

once again chaps thanks for all the kind words of support..

ed

 

[DHTiling]

no probs ed mate... we are here if you need help with any tiling issues....:yes:

 

[faithhealer]

Sorry to hear your news Ed. Anybody who cares for anyone with alzheimers is a hero in my book. Very best of luck to you, your family and your brother. keep going mate 'cos we are all behind you.

 

[baht'at]

hi there, i was sorry to hear about your father, have you applied for attendance allowance, it is my understanding that anyone who is self funding is entitled to this, also if he requires nursing care (not residential care) there should be some funded care allowance available insist he is reassessed. The government will pay as little as they can get away with. make some noise as a relative you have more power than you think!!!!!!!
Hope you don't mind me using my husbands forum to reply to you
good luck Baht'at Richards wife.

 

[beattsmjk]

My thoughts echo those that have already been stated. The honest hardworking folk of this godforsaken country get shafted at every turn whilst all the bloody workshy benefit scrounging lower underbelly of society get helped at every available opportunity.

it makes my blood boil.

I think you are doing the right thing in setting up in OZ. Ive been there a few times and it really is a land of opportunity. good luck mate, and well done for remaining so unbelievably positive in spite of the situations you have had to deal with.

Mark

 

[tiler burden]

hi baht'at

yes we've tried to go for 'continued care' which the state/nhs fund. he failed the criteria. even that is assessed every year.

i have tried every way but unfortunately i have to accept it. the last couple of years have been hard and i have taken myself through the mill mentally but theres so many people worse off than me in life. at least ive got a good wife, great kids and my health and determination so i very lucky in a lot of ways. i have learned some hard lessons but again they either make you or break you and id like to think they go to making me a better person.

again thanks for all the support from everyone on here, its a great forum full of good people.........

ed

 

[IvegotsTILE]

All the best mate,great to see you've got the right attitude.Life swings in roundabouts and I believe in karma,do good things and look after others and good things will happen to you....in the end

 

[brian c]

good attitude you have ED,all the best m8. Brian:grouphug:

 

[Smitten]

It's the same way in the United States. They take the house, use the value to pay for care, and only once that money is used up do they qualify for government funded care.
My Grandmother lived for 20 years in a nursing home. I am quite sure the small amount they got for her house was used up in the first five years.

It's heartwrencing to watch the deterioration, especially when the person appears to be perfectly healthy in every other aspect.

All you can do is be the best darn Tiler your Dad has ever seen!

Hugs,

Smitten

 

[Dan]

Chin-up TB... you seem strong. You'll be ok in the long run i'm sure mate.
----
p.s. we'll take your sound advice onboard

 

[GazTech]

Edd your strenghth and determination is an inspiration to us all....big respect bro.......Gaz

 

[reaper72]

Follow that yellow brick road all the way to oz mate.....know a tiler who worked out there....apparently they're very well paid.....you'll get a decent life out there rest assured

all the best..................