Can’t fit, won’t fit. I’m an idiot

[Clumsyculcheth]

Hi folks. Another day, another forum to signup for advice from better folk than I. This time its tiles. One of the many positives of the internet. I won’t pretend I’ve come here to join a community or to make a positive contribution, I’ve come to get help with a job I cannot master then I’ll be off as quick as I arrived. I hope one day some of you may need help with formulas in a spreadsheet or help with something telecoms related and I may be able to return the favour. What? No thanks I hear you say, oh well, I would be more than happy to help. Anyway, on to the confessions of a flummoxed flight of tiling fancy.

I am trying to tile a 800 quadrant shower. My boss would like it to be tiles up to and not past the enclosure that will be added as soon as I can tile the wall. The enclosure sits at 790mm. My (bosses) tiles are 150mm glazed crackly tile jobbies. She wants a 3mm grout line and a brick bond.

I have found my centres, I have drawn on my walls, I have tried to offset my centre line. Whatever I try the second row has a sliver of a tile at the end or on the bit where the 2 walls meet.

So some calcs. One wall is 790. Divided by 153mm (tile and grout line) leaves 5.16 tiles meaning I’ll have a cut somewhere or 25mm. One wall is 782 (wall length minus tile thickness) leaving 5.11 tiles which leaves a cut somewhere of 17mm. Now dependant on where I start I can’t get 2 rows bonded without a sliver somewhere

I’ve tried starting where the 2 walls meet, I’ve tried starting at a centre, I’ve tried offsetting the centre and I’m getting nowhere. I did get it close starting where the 2 walls meet but the screw holes for the rails either go through the end of the tiles or the grout line.

Any advice appreciated

 

[Andy Allen]

I always fix the tiles to the edge of the tray, or you will have very little tile to fix the surround too.
On another note you must seal crackle glazed tiles, on the face and any cut edge.

 

[Boggs]

As Andy has said, tiling to the edge of the tray is a must.
Shower enclosures must only be sealed on the outside so any moisture that builds up within the frame can drain to the inside.
Also the joint between tray and tiles must be fully sealed before the enclosure is installed.

 

[Bathfix Bob]

So your boss is a woman and she's asked you to tile her bathroom?

 

[Andy Allen]

So your boss is a woman and she's asked you to tile her bathroom?

Should imagine he's referring to his wife.

 

[Bathfix Bob]

So he's married to his female boss?

 

[One Day]

So he's married to his female boss?

Isn't that how it works?!

 

[One Day]

...and the boss will usually be upset if it takes more than a few hours to complete

 

[Bathfix Bob]

yeah but you might refer to your wife as 'the boss' but not actually 'my boss'..

 

[Waluigi]

Sounds like another course cowboy learning at the customers expense

 

[One Day]

yeah but you might refer to your wife as 'the boss' but not actually 'my boss'..

Maybe still in the honeymoon period then?

 

[Clumsyculcheth]

Hello. Hope this message finds you in fine fettle.
The boss, my boss. My wife in this instance. Nothing to do with my grumpy Yorkshire male actual work boss. He’s less attractive than my wife and could probably tile the shower without help from your good selves.

So tile to the end of the tray you say? The enclosure sits 10mm shy of the tray on both sides when offered up and the screw holes are on the inside of the enclosure. I bought some fancy chrome tile strips to cover the edge of the tiles and to fit flush against the enclosure and therefore presumed I could only tile up to the 790mm or if I still use them I will now have a 10mm gap between strip and enclosure (£18 each from B&Q. Nearly died) which won’t look a great finish.

I’ll have to go redo my centres on 800 and see if the tiles sit any better. I guess those ‘Slivers’ will now become 20mm longer maybe?

This is my first tiling job (well, I did the downstairs bog floor the other week but that was like 10 tiles and not a brick bond, and not on uneven walls) only you tube and web research got me this far

One of my walls is 25mm wider at the top than the bottom when drawing a plumb line at 800 off the base (if that makes sense) so I believe I should aim to have the small cuts where the 2 walls meet and just make the smallest that little bit bigger as I go up the wall to trick the eye?


Sorry for another essay chaps.

Help me rescue my marriage

I may A) get a professional in or B) tile way past the enclosure but symmetrically both sides and use only full or half tiles or C) follow your advice to go to the end of the base but change my edging strips to be the white/cream ones that aren’t meant to be flush with the enclosure but just cover the edge of the tiles

Thanks also for pointing out that I have to seal any cut tiles. I was aware I needed to seal the tiles but hadn’t thought about the cut edges

Regards

Andrew

 

[Bathfix Bob]

Op...who are you tiling for?

 

[Boggs]

Admittedly it doesn’t take much, but I am really confused now.

 

[Clumsyculcheth]

Myself and my wife. We have kind of ran out of money on our refurb so tiling is down to me. Our tiles are approx 150mm x 75mm. I say approx as some are 148mm some 151mm etc. Space is roughly 800mm on each wall with a rise of 2390mm from base to ceiling.
Cheers. Andrew