Joke to start the week off

G

Gazzer

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders.

The man says, “A hamburger, fries and a coke,” and turns to the ostrich, “What's yours?”

“I'll have the same,” says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress returns with the order.

“That will be $9.40 please,” and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment.

The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, “A hamburger, fries and a coke.” The ostrich says, “I'll have the same.”

Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.

This becomes routine until the two enter again. “The usual?” asks the waitress.

“No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a salad,” says the man. “Same,” says the ostrich.

Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, “That will be $32.62.”

Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table.

The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer.

“Excuse me sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change in your pocket every time?”

“Well,” says the man, “several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there.”

“That's brilliant!” says the waitress. “Most people would ask for a million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!”

“That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there,” says the man.

The waitress asks, “What's with the ostrich?”

The man sighs, pauses and answers, “My second wish was for a tall chick with a big butt and long legs who agrees with everything I say.”
 
THE TALL CHICK IS MARIE YOU WOULD BE LOOKING FOR HA HA SHE AKAWYS HAPPY TO HELP LOL:yes:
 
Tall chick i don't think so. One of the fellas nick name is stumpy for me!!!

Hayley i will get you back for this.
 
well let the lads see some pics and we can make our own minds up.....and stop nattering on my thread you 2 :grin:
 
Steady on girls. 🙂

Nice Joke there mate. I'll have to remember that one. (I never ever do when I try though).
 
I can bearly use the site marie is helping me, i am the joker out of the too of use,

just practicing how to use it so thought this thread would be perfect
Joke of the week via Joker
 
I can bearly use the site marie is helping me, i am the joker out of the too of use,

just practicing how to use it so thought this thread would be perfect
Joke of the week via Joker

You go for it Hayley. Click all the buttons you shouldn't be able to break anything that can't be fixed quickly 🙂

Our average member age is around 47. If they can do it you can I'm sure.
 
you dont no what i am like give it a month and you will be locking me out yourselve ha ha
 

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