Discuss Tales Of Rogues And Rough Arses in the Australia Tiling Forum area at TilersForums.com.

Ste-G

TF
Arms
111
398
Merseyside
Thought it might be a bit of fun (and maybe educational) for members to share a few stories of characters they may have worked with or come across over the years. It's probably best if no real names are used just in case.
I'll get the ball rolling with a few that I have remembered.
The first was a tiler who was tiling the changing rooms at a local swimming baths for his brothers company.
He worked on it for a week or so and then booked in his work with his brother and was paid for it straight away.
The following week the brother gets a phone call from the main contractor complaining about the lack of progress. Bemused he visits the site only to find all the tiles still on the pallets, not a single one had been laid.
After a few days of trying to track down his brother he found out he'd been offered work in Germany and used the free money to finance his trip.
The next was a tiler who had a special tape measure he used for measuring up at the end of the week.
Every Thursday the boss would come to site to book the lads work in. They were doing a lot of work in factories and schools at the time so the areas were pretty big. Anyway the boss not trusting the lads to read the tape correctly would take the tape of the tiler and ask them to hold the end while he read the tape and wrote down the measurements. Little did he know the tiler had cut away the first couple of feet of tape and reattached the end. Every week he got paid for work he had never done.
The last one and my favourite is about a tiler who done some tiling on the external wall of a shopping centre.
The wall had been tiled in quarry tiles and was at least six metres high. Upon completion the architect and the clerk of works came around to inspect it. Not happy with the job they told him to sort out several tiles that were lipping quite badly, the early morning sun was shinning diagonally across the face of the tiles and not doing the surface any favours at all. Not the slightest bit offended the tiler apologized for the poor workmanship and told them he would attend to it at once and for them to come back in a few hours and check it again.
Just after lunch the architect and clerk appeared around the corner and seeing the wall congratulated him on the efficiency and skill of the corrected work and moved on, happy to sign off the finished job.
In reality the tiler hadn't even picked up a trowel never mind a hammer and had simply waited for the sun to move around in the sky and was face on to the wall and all the lips had disappeared.
You might not approve of this behavior but you have to admire the cheek.
 
Last edited:
I

Italy

Thought it might be a bit of fun (and maybe educational) for members to share a few stories of characters they may have worked with or come across over the years. It's probably best if no real names are used just in case.
I'll get the ball rolling with a few that I have remembered.
The first was a tiler who was tiling the changing rooms at a local swimming baths for his brothers company.
He worked on it for a week or so and then booked in his work with his brother and was paid for it straight away.
The following week the brother gets a phone call from the main contractor complaining about the lack of progress. Bemused he visits the site only to find all the tiles still on the pallets, not a single one had been laid.
After a few days of trying to track down his brother he found out he'd been offered work in Germany and used the free money to finance his trip.
The next was a tiler who had a special tape measure he used for measuring up at the end of the week.
Every Thursday the boss would come to site to book the lads work in. They were doing a lot of work in factories and schools at the time so the areas were pretty big. Anyway the boss not trusting the lads to read the tape correctly would take the tape of the tiler and ask them to hold the end while he read the tape and wrote down the measurements. Little did he know the tiler had cut away the first couple of feet of tape and reattached the end. Every week he got paid for work he had never done.
The last one and my favourite is about a tiler who done some tiling on the external wall of a shopping centre.
The wall had been tiled in quarry tiles and was at least six metres high. Upon completion the architect and the clerk of works came around to inspect it. Not happy with the job they told him to sort out several tiles that were lipping quite badly, the early mourning sun was shinning diagonally across the face of the tiles and not doing the surface any favours at all. Not the slightest bit offended the tiler apologized for the poor workmanship and told them he would attend to it at once and for them to come back in a few hours and check it again.
Just after lunch the architect and clerk appeared around the corner and seeing the wall congratulated him on the efficiency and skill of the corrected work and moved on, happy to sign off the finished job.
In reality the tiler hadn't even picked up a trowel never mind a hammer and had simply waited for the sun to move around in the sky and was face on to the wall and all the lips had disappeared.
You might not approve of this behavior but you have to admire the cheek.
the story tape I did also I .ahahah stolen 11 square meters, then surveyor noticed ;) I was still young
 
T

The D

I know a lad that had to tile a hall floor in quarry tiles I picked up the tiles oops i mean he picked up the tiles and went to the job. The lady of the house let him in and made a drink then left for work ,he started to remove the carpet and underneath was a vinyl floor covering so he removed that as well , to his surprise under the vinyl was a quarry floor so he cleaned it up regrouted it and took the tiles back for a refund. He returned to the house later that evening to collect his money the lady of the house was over the moon with it and even commented how authentic it looked saying it is as if it had always been there.
 
S

StevieBoy

I know a lad that had to tile a hall floor in quarry tiles I picked up the tiles oops i mean he picked up the tiles and went to the job. The lady of the house let him in and made a drink then left for work ,he started to remove the carpet and underneath was a vinyl floor covering so he removed that as well , to his surprise under the vinyl was a quarry floor so he cleaned it up regrouted it and took the tiles back for a refund. He returned to the house later that evening to collect his money the lady of the house was over the moon with it and even commented how authentic it looked saying it is as if it had always been there.
That's a well cheeky one.
 
W

White Room

I know a lad that had to tile a hall floor in quarry tiles I picked up the tiles oops i mean he picked up the tiles and went to the job. The lady of the house let him in and made a drink then left for work ,he started to remove the carpet and underneath was a vinyl floor covering so he removed that as well , to his surprise under the vinyl was a quarry floor so he cleaned it up regrouted it and took the tiles back for a refund. He returned to the house later that evening to collect his money the lady of the house was over the moon with it and even commented how authentic it looked saying it is as if it had always been there.

The man was on the ball there then.....
 
J

Just Rizzle

once put a floor down in a car show room 300 x 300 6mtrs by 6mtrs square with a 2 mtr boarder which was to be carpet .
did it over night so in the morning the client turns up, looks at the job then said he wanted it at 45 not square.
my mate whos job it was took him to the corner and told him to look across at the other corner opposite there he says thats at 45 .
 

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Ste-G

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Tales Of Rogues And Rough Arses
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