Uncolaberated slate!

[sWe]

I once got sent to a customer who had bought tiles without even looking at them. Literally. Aparantly he got them of "some guy who knew a guy"... There were like seven diffent types and looks. Stoneware, porcelain, some white (like Brad Pitt's teeth white) some mud brownish-green, beige, even a few pieces of gray marble, and almost all of it was damaged in some way... And the guy wanted me to make his floor pretty.......... Told him it would look like the ****-sandwhich of the century. He proceeded to call my boss and complain. I begged my then-boss to let me off that one, but he insisted... Told him it was the kind of customer who was unlikely to pay, but the boss persisted. Boss told me he knew the guy's aunt or something, so it was "risk free"... Reminded him that she hadn't paid either (edit: and that she, in fact, owed him the equivialent of £1000). To make the story short; floor looked like crap (actually, more like vomited pizza), customer didn't pay, boss was furious, blamed me. I was ****ing livid at the stupid tard. I quit not long after that, best move I've made in the last few years.

Edit. My then-boss was a good guy when I started working for him, but he went and got himself hooked on gambling. Tip of the day: Don't get yerself hooked on gambling or some dumb **** like that. It increases the likelyhood of you doing oh-so-very-stupid things.

 

[GazTech]

I once got sent to a customer who had bought tiles without even looking at them. Literally. Aparantly he got them of "some guy who knew a guy"... There were like seven diffent types and looks. Stoneware, porcelain, some white (like Brad Pitt's teeth white) some mud brownish-green, beige, even a few pieces of gray marble, and almost all of it was damaged in some way... And the guy wanted me to make his floor pretty.......... Told him it would look like the ****-sandwhich of the century. He proceeded to call my boss and complain. I begged my then-boss to let me off that one, but he insisted... Told him it was the kind of customer who was unlikely to pay, but the boss persisted. Boss told me he knew the guy's aunt or something, so it was "risk free"... Reminded him that she hadn't paid either (edit: and that she, in fact, owed him the equivialent of £1000). To make the story short; floor looked like crap (actually, more like vomited pizza), customer didn't pay, boss was furious, blamed me. I was ****ing livid at the stupid tard. I quit not long after that, best move I've made in the last few years.

Edit. My then-boss was a good guy when I started working for him, but he went and got himself hooked on gambling. Tip of the day: Don't get yerself hooked on gambling or some dumb **** like that. It increases the likelyhood of you doing oh-so-very-stupid things.

I'm dying..slow horses, fast women,...crooked cards, and straight gin......

 

[Fekin]

Uncolaberated

Nice

 

[Pawelzik]

I love wivers....every forum needs its star:21:

 

[m.w.tiling]

tell her, with slate the beauty is in the roughness. Or show her some more expensive slate explain the difference and hit her with that aswell.:ninja:

 

[bencurtis]

i hate slate, only price it as a day rate never put a job price in :furious3:

 

[sWe]

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Thick and thin, ugly, stained and bloody annoying.... and thats just TJ.

If i never use this slate from Topps again it will be too soon.

Not 30 x 30 as it claims on the pack, but more of a 32 x 27.

Its about as square as a Dorrito, and as flat as DH's belly.

If the customer asks me to try and keep the grout lines uniform one more time i'm gonna hit her over the head with the thickest piece of slate there, wich is about 30 mm thick and then cut her fingers off with my bucket trowel!!!!!!!!

Next time (!), make sure to tell the customer that you "can't make the grout lines uniform with this material", but that you can "do them a way that gives the room a rustic feel". That's tile-anese for "you picked the tiles, moron, and I can only do so much with them, so either accept a bit crooked lines or buy new friggin tiles!".

By saying such things (the first two bits, not the last bit, obviously), you will radiate pro-ness, and if the customer isn't a complete cerebral equivialent of a roadkill, he/she will likely "value your professional input". 🙂

And oh, if the customer says something like "but I don't want rustic!", then you just reply that it's all you can do with these particular tiles. If he/she still don't want to return them and get proper materials, and still don't want the rustic feel, then just say something like it's all you can do with them. Then add that "rustic slate is all the rage" and that "it goes well with both classic and modern furnishings". That's a subtle way of reasuringly saying "this is all I can do under present curcumstances! Buy proper tiles or go away!". Or, just turn the job down (unless you need it of course).

Ultimately, it's not your fault that the customer picked shoddy materials, and it's pretty ****ing hard to exceed limiting circumstances which are being forced upon you. However, with a few carefully chosen words, and sufficient effort, the customer might not ***** about a so-so result, which, obviously, was the customers fault to begin with.

Cheers.