jokes

[ScottG13]

A man is in a bar sipping on his first pint when a monkey swings down and steals his beer. The man asks the barman who owns the monkey and he points to the piano player. The man walks up to the piano player and says "Do you know your monkey stlole my beer." he replies "No, but if you hum it I'll play it."

 

[doug boardley]

Apparently 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese!

So its either my Mum, my Dad, my brother John or my my Sister Mae Ling

But I think it's John......

 

[Derry]

Apparently 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese!

So its either my Mum, my Dad, my brother John or my my Sister Mae Ling

But I think it's John......

ANOTHER TAXI??!!! It's like a rank in here lol!

 

[nybor62]

What do women, and KFC have in common???

....You start with the breast, slowly work your way down the thigh, and are only ever left
with a greasy box to put your bone in.........

 

[Scott]

I just got back from the world erection competiton, i only made it through to the semi's

 

[Ian]

I just got back from the world erection competiton, i only made it through to the semi's

I'm home alone laughing like I'm 5 years old! Quality! Simple things!

 

[Scott]

I have more but not sure how far the TF boundaries stretch! maybe ill Pm you them

 

[Ian]

I have more but not sure how far the TF boundaries stretch! maybe ill Pm you them

Its late at night! If they're inapropriate Dave will bin them! PM if you prefer, I love a good joke!

 

[SandyFloor]

I entered a marathon semaphore competition .....after fifteen hours I was flagging badly.

 

[Scott]

Ill pm them to be safe, some are a little too much!

 

[DHTiling]

Its late at night! If they're inapropriate Dave will bin them! PM if you prefer, I love a good joke!

We have rules for a reason.. and not post things to create moderation duties.???

Ill pm them to be safe, some are a little too much!

Steady.....!!!

Elite forum is for no holds jokes scott.

 

[Ian]

Two old ladies meet up at the park, one says to the other 'did you come on the bus?' the other says 'yeah, but I made it look like an asthma attack!'

 

[Scott]

I mistook my tippex for my liquid viagra yesterday and woke up this morning with a massive correction

 

[DHTiling]

Two old ladies meet up at the park, one says to the other 'did you come on the bus?' the other says 'yeah, but I made it look like an asthma attack!'

:lol:
:lol:

 

[jay]

A Priest was about to finish his tour of duty, and was leaving his Mission in the jungle where he has spent years teaching the natives when he realizes that the one thing he never taught them was how to speak English.

So he takes the chief for a walk in the forest. He points to a tree and says to the chief,
"This is a tree."

The chief looks at the tree and grunts, "Tree."

The Priest is pleased with the response. They walk a little further and he points to a rock and says, "This is a rock."

Hearing this, the chief looks and grunts, "Rock."

The Priest was really getting enthusiastic about the results when he hears a rustling in the bushes. As they peek over the top, he sees a couple of natives in the midst of heavy sexual activity.

The Priest is really flustered and quickly responds, "Man riding a bike."

The chief looks at the couple briefly, pulls out his blowgun and kills them.

The Priest goes ballistic and yells at the chief that he has spent years teaching the tribe how to be civilized and be kind to each other, so how could he kill these people in cold blood that way?

The chief replied,


"My bike."




ENJOY YOUR DAY and remember to keep off the roads when riding somebody else's bicycle.