Hi Pebbs,
Thanks for coming to me with this problem as soon as you have , we need to get this sorted quickly before your standards drop and you find yourself in Lidl's rubbing your legs over a bottle of White Lightening Cider.
Believe me being escorted off the premises by their security guards there is very very embarrassing indeed.
They manhandle you with such force that your trousers fall down, you fall over and end up ontop of a pensioner....erm ...so i've heard..
Anyway, i believe that the source of this problem goes right back to your teenage years....was you a problem drinker in your youth? Did you stand on street corners late at night drinking thunderbird, 20/20, super T and any other alcohol you could get a passer by get for you from the local off licence?
I think what we need to do is simple....firstly we phone all the local super market chains and make them aware of your rubbing problem, i'm sure they will be happy to ban you from store.
Then i think we should ask Dave to Silicon your arms to your side so that you physically can't move them.
After 6 weeks cold turkey i think you will feel much better, of course you will have to live by drinking protein milkshakes through a straw during that period, but it will be worth it to be able to browse the drinks isle freely once again.
I hope this is of help and good luck.
Wives, you soooo need to check this guy out and register on his forum and blog.
His ebay listing: 2001 FORD FOCUS GHIA 1.8 Zetec Very Clean Interior | eBay UK
His website: Pistolfeet.com