Jokes!

[Yorkie]

Two ariels sitting on a roof, One says to the other
"didn't you get married last week"
"Yeah " came the reply "the wedding was **** but the reception was brilliant!"

I know sad aint it lol

 

[brian c]

gaz wot does pmsl mean please i know its short 4 something but i too thick to work it out!

pissing my self
----
some good jokes on there.

 

[stumac]

man sitting on plane when stewardess asks him 'can i get you a drink sir?'man replies coffee pls milk no sugar. at which point a parrot sitting two seats away pipes up, you ya pregnant dog get me a f**kin whisky!!! the stewardess return with the whisky but no coffee for the man,this happens three more times with the parrot being more and more cheeky and rude! F**k this says the man,if it works for a parrot maybe i shld try it, the stewardess walks by and the man shouts 'you ya f**kin pregnant dog wheres my f***in coffee and f***in hurry up you stupid cow!!!the stewardess returns with a male steward who grabs both the man and the parrot by the throat and throws both of them out of the plane,as the hurtle towards the ground the parrot says to the man 'for a c**t that cant fly your a right cheeky *******!!!'

 

[CLAYS TILES]

check this video out,,, well funny!
broken link removed

 

[stumac]

check this video out,,, well funny!
http://users.skynet.be/pdauwe/ursula_martinez.wmv

love it wonder where she keeps her wand

 

[CLAYS TILES]

love it wonder where she keeps her wand

well you saw the video, try the other end

 

[enduro]

John Darwin has walked into a police station having been missing, presumed dead for 5 years. He said thats the last time he goes on holiday with the MCcanns...

 

[Yorkie]

Heather mc'cartneys leg is for sale on ebay, description says it will make a good stocking filler

 

[devonmark]

A woman in a jewellers shop breaks wind bending over to look at a beautiful diamond ring. She looks around embarrassed and sees the salesman standing right behind her. Totally professional he say's "good day madam, how may I help you ?"
Hoping he maybe hadn't heard her 'accident' she asks "sir, what's the price of this lovely ring ?"
He answers "madam, if you farted just looking at it, you're going to sh*t yourself when I tell you the price !"

 

[White Room]

Be warned Shopping Sam. In Tesco while packing shopping in car, you may be approached by 2 fit 18 year old girls in tight tiny tops. They wash your screen with t*ts hanging out and ask for lift to next shop ask payment. On way they strip and go down on each other. Then 1 climbs in front and s**ks you off. The other then nicks your wallet! I had mine stolen last Tuesday & Wednesday, twice on Thursday, again on Saturday and also yesterday. Be careful ........